Do Not Hide the Pregnancy Because it Will Show Anyway

I love all mothers. They not only have the enormous task of sheltering the unborn for nine Months but they also mother us. Mothers provide some kind of refuge that only nature can explain. I read somewhere recently that one way of discouraging abortion is to take the patient for a scan and allow her to see the living foetus in her belly. When a woman sees her child and realises that she is about to kill her own baby – I don’t know what happens but somehow her maternal instincts tells her to say no. I am told this method has worked effectively to discourage abortion in many parts of the US.

I know almost nothing about pregnancy apart from the fact that it is is quite visible and obvious to the public. I also know that it’s cause more than often is obvious to everyone – though of late the rate of invitrofertilisation has been on the rise. What intrigues me is that many young girls often try to hide their pregnancies as if it was something that they could hide for ever. The problem is that the more time advances the more the evidences speaks for itself. Things are made worse by those who are discouraging and abusive to the young girls who more than often are victims of circumstances- albeit their ignorance.

I am speaking of the so-called unwanted pregnancies or rather unplanned pregnancies, lest you get me wrong! I am not going to support or castigate this kind of pregnancy but want to say emphatically that once it has happened let it be. Ignoring the obvious cause (Of course invitrofertilisation is by choice and only a lunatic would hide or abort) should be the inevitable as you focus on sustenance and development of the new being. So girls, don’t press these dear ones too hard with the waistline of your trousers – if it were in my hands I would prefer the old fashioned maternity dress for I hear it is way too cormfy.

I also want to advice the mothers and guardians of these dear ones that it once their babies choose to explore their mothering ability your antenna should rise high and remember the priority of your daughter’s safety over the sanctity of the family’s name. This is the major undoing of especially religious mothers. They think so much of their tarnished images at the expense of their daughter’s lives that they end up endangering their lives.

This attitude may breed two possible scenarios. Case one, the mother would always rush to procure abortion. This happens especially with those of the liberal wing who think that they run the monopoly over morality and that they can twist the wand at their pleasure. This is not common in Kenya but is increasingly on the rise. The other scenario is quite common, recurrent and most dangerous. The mother hides the daughter. Somehow the girl is kept away from public reach – maybe to her aunt far away. Most of the time this aunt could be some woman without family as those with families would always say that your daughter could be “a bad influence to theirs.” This groups of mothers is the kind that I choose to address today.

If you choose to keep the baby – which is the right thing and is my preference – then keep the babies please and give your daughter a life. You don’t even have to start a new lecture on premarital sex because she already has it. If she drops out of school, please don’t call the new angel a “school certificate” for you don’t know what they may become – including but not limited to being the president of the United States. Hiding the girl may kill her morale and permanently damage her esteem. Alternatively she may overreact and end up being the disgrace you were evading in the first place. Overall, girls, avoid unnecessary and unwanted pregnancy at all costs because it surely comes with its baggage. But if you get into it be ready and willing to carry it forever. Remember the irresponsible man will always keep aloof. You may even think their transcendence on the situation is godly. Pregnancy is always a challenging thing to the mother. I admonish even the married couples to exercise caution before they decide to have their babies and when they do they should be ready to bear the full responsibility.

So I say, even if a child is conceived through rape or whatever keep the child and nature him well. History will treat you kindly for that – trust me it will. You don’t have to be religious to think right.

Now to my main point. We have a child – Kenya who was conceived through rape (a stolen election and an ensuing violent protest thereafter). There has been a pregnancy for the past one year and the gestation period has not been a beautiful one. To make matters worse, the two culprits got into an unholy matrimony (Grand Coalition Government) to solemnise or rather conceal this unplanned pregnancy and make it look legitimate, enshrining it into the constitution in the name of the National accord.

My readers may recall this mantra that I have always quoted – Peace whenever possible truth at all costs. I still stand by it. During the Post election violence, a dear friend sent me a short text message saying “People are condemning about the violence but they are legitimising the theft. Where is our morality?” Today I still insist that the ODM truce was a facade, a political blunder and a betrayal to the citizenry and I’ll get to that later. For now I’ll stay on the analogy of the hidden pregnancy.

Not too long after the Peace Accord was signed an unanimously voted for into the constitution cracks begun to shown within the GCG. Questions of the pecking order, security details, housing office and staffing for the PM, communication within government, role of the Prime minister and VP, Appointment into government departments and State corporations, pursuing the reform agenda among many other things begun to arise. Instead of being forthright with Kenyans, the PM took us for a ride and told us that the GCG is running smoothly with just a few teething problems which would be ironed out with time. He kept defending the performance of the GCG and said he had a cordial relationship with the President and that they met and consulted regularly which begs the question, how then does he keep implementing things you have not agreed about.

I know that your intentions of hiding the tension from kenyans was genuine – you hoped that one day you would successfully convince Kibaki into reforms. But Raila your judgment was wrong. A pig would only give birth to a pig however long or short the pregnancy. You see, some mothers, after hiding their pregnant daughters, try to cheat their husbands that the daughter is just visiting an aunt and that she would be back soon. The pregnancy of the young girl is kept from the father until it is too late when he is asked to contribute some cash for the hospital bill – normally this happens when there is a medical emergency and an urgent operation has been done without his consent.

Most mothers when asked would retort “But Baba Nani, can’t we discuss this after our daughter has received her treatment? Let us deal with the situation fast.” She does this hoping that the man will cool down after seeing his bouncing grandchild – and surely some do. Others however, take offense and rightly so.

They argue that the pregnancy is a disgrace but most importantly they say that they have lost trust after having been deceived for nine months. They question what more would have done without his knowledge. You see, a daughter’s pregnancy may be devastating but nothing is worse than an unfaithful spouse.

So this mother may be very faithful in her marital obligations – she might even be a serious Church mother, but this one instance of dishonesty may be the beginning of mistrust in her marriage. And I think the man would be right to distrust her from thence forth. Other women may argue that the man is suspicious for nothing – that he is reacting out of an isolated case – but hey! What with the woman not trusting him in the first place with the information about the daughter’s pregnancy? So who sowed the seed of distrust?

Raila Odinga has been in this game with us for a while  so even though he says that his hands are, it is him who tied  himself into an unecessary illegitimate  marriage when he endorsed a pregnancy that wasn’t his. So now it won’t matter to us anymore that his election victory was stolen. He legitimised it hoping that the marriage would be rosy. He even kept assuring us that all was well when we knew for sure that this girl Kenya was carrying a child from an incestuous relationship. Nobody cares anymore that the girl was raped long after the truth has been kept away from the stakeholders. This, unfortunately, is bad for the girl who will still be in need of some therapeutic intervention having gone through such an horrendous ordeal.

So Baba Fidel today is confirming that the pregnancy we have always suspected is in fact real. That in fact he has always been lying to us – albeit with good intentions. But his means has failed to justify the end and so he is going back to the drawing board. Too bad Bwana Tinga. You remain badly exposed and the game is to portray you as a whiner who cannot function in government. You see, your strongest selling point has always been reforms. By taking away your ability to implement them and making it look like you are in fact an complicit to the corrupt deals you remain screwed. But again you are a politician – I only wait with baited breadth to see the way you do your thing.

Meanwhile, now it is clear to all Kenyans, including the toddlers and the blind (I mean the myopic type – not downplaying the intellect and other faculties of the physically challenged) that mother Kenya is carrying a child. The birth pangs have begun. Are we ready this time? Will we fruitfully deliver the baby? Or is it going to be another still birth? And what are we going to do with the illegitimate Child?

To the spiritualizers out there, this is not an allegory.

I am sure you have not learned any lesson. I have not either and I didn’t intend to any way. I am just whining.